Series 06 Episode 22 – The Proton Resurgence

Leonard: The interface is pretty simple. You put your horizontal X coordinate here, vertical Y coordinate here. When you're happy with those, you press this button. Penny: Got it. Sheldon: Leonard, you'll never guess who I just found online. Hey! Leonard: Nice shot. Penny: Eh, his giant head did most of the work. Sheldon: Very mature. You're lucky I'm out of silly string. As I was saying, Leonard, you'll never guess 永远猜不到 who I just found online. Professor Proton. Leonard: You're kidding. He's still alive? Sheldon: Yes. Penny: Who's Professor Proton? Leonard: He was the host of this great… Hey! Penny: Yes! Sorry, tell me about Professor Proton. Sheldon: Professor Proton hosted my favourite science show when I was a child. I never missed an episode. He demonstrated scientific principles using everyday objects. Leonard: It was pretty cool. Penny: Aw, so cute when you use the word cool wrong. Like when kids say pasghetti. Sheldon: Oh, dear lord, Leonard, look. He's still available for parties and events. We should hire him. Leonard: Hire him to do what? Sheldon: Well, whatever we want. Hang out, do experiments, make him take 12 pictures with us so we can make a calendar. Leonard: It would be pretty awesome to hang out with him. I just used awesome wrong, didn't I? Sheldon: Well, I'm e-mailing him right now. Leonard: Do you remember his old theme song? Sheldon: Of course I do. Together: Grab your goggles, put your lab coat on, here he comes, Professor Proton. Raj: Hey, I just found out I have to be at the telescope lab all weekend. Any chance you and Bernadette could take care of my dog? Howard: Why don't you put her in a kennel 狗之家? Raj: Why don't you put your mother in a home? Howard: To be honest, she'd do better in the kennel. I'll talk to Bernie. I'm sure it's fine. Raj: Thank you. Sheldon: It's happening. Leonard, it's happening. Professor Proton is coming to our house. Leonard: You're kidding. Howard: You mean the guy who used to host that lame kids show? Sheldon: And you just got yourself uninvited. See? I told you I'd find a tactful way to do that. Howard: How'd you get him to come to your house? Sheldon: As Professor Proton always says, there is no problem you can't solve if you use your noggin. Leonard: And he wrote him a cheque. Sheldon: Yeah, that, too. Big cheque. Raj: Uncle Howard. Cinnamon's here for her sleepover party. Howard: You know if you had a stroke, she'd eat you, right? Raj: And it would be my pleasure to be her num-num. Howard: Okay, so what do I need to know to take care of her? Raj: It's very simple. For breakfast, she has an egg-white frittata. Feel free to give her a choice of home fries or an English muffin, but not both. We're watching our weight. Uh, for dinner, something simple, a veal chop, some scampi, whatever you like. Howard: Classy dog. Raj: Yes. Also, don't forget to close the toilet or she'll drink out of it. Howatd: I feel for ya. I've got a psychotic mommy, too. Sheldon (off): Leonard, are you in bed? Leonard: Yes. Sheldon (off): Me, too. Leonard: Great. Sheldon (off): I can't sleep. Leonard: Well, I can, so shut up. Sheldon (off): Do you realize that in less than nine hours, Arthur Jeffries, aka Professor Proton, will be in our apartment? Leonard: Sheldon, you know that if you stay up all night, you're gonna be sleepy tomorrow. And a sleepy Sheldon is a cranky Sheldon. And a cranky Sheldon is actually no different than a regular Sheldon. Good night. Sheldon (off): I'm thinking of wearing a tuxedo. Leonard: That's not ridiculous. Good night. Sheldon (off): Do you have cufflinks? Leonard: No. Sheldon (off): Ah, just as well. Where can you rent a tuxedo at three o'clock in the morning? Leonard: Okay, good night. Sheldon (off): Nice to meet you, Professor Proton. Nice to meet you, Professor Proton. Nice to meet you, Professor Proton. Nice to meet you, Prof… Ow! Leonard? Leonard: What? Sheldon (off): I still can't sleep. Scene: Howard and Bernadette's apartment. Howard: She really tuckered herself out at the park, huh? Bernadette: Yeah, you two were so cute playing together. Howard: It was kind of fun throwing a ball and not having anyone laugh at me. Bernadette: And you were sweet not to throw it too far so she didn't wear out her tiny legs. Howard: Yeah, that's what I was doing. Bernadette: You know, there were a few moments today when I almost felt like we were a little family. Howard: Really? Bernadette: Yeah. I never thought of myself as a mom, but when the three of us were out there having fun, I felt like maybe someday we could do it. Howard: Of course we can. Especially if our baby's as calm and quiet as little Cinna… Son of a bitch, she's gone. Bernadette: Where'd she go? Howard: I don't know, she didn't leave a note. Bernadette: Well, you were the one who was supposed to put her back in the stroller 小推车, 小孩推车 ( pram, pushchair, baby buggy, travel cot, carrier, car seat, booster seat). Howard: No, I wasn't. You were. Bernadette: No, I wasn't. Howard: Yes, you were!. Bernadette: Yeah, well, you throw like a girl. Scene: The apartment. Sheldon: I'm getting worried. Penny: Relax, Sheldon, he's only a few minutes late. Sheldon: Professor Proton was never late when he was on TV. You know, every day, four o'clock, he was there. Unless tornadoes were ripping apart 肆虐 East Texas, in which case we'd join him in progress. (Phone rings) It's him. Hello. Well, I see. Yes. All right, we can come get you 来接你. Yeah, well, see you soon. Bye. Leonard: Where is he? Sheldon: The third floor landing(I. [countable/uncountable] the process of moving a plane down onto the ground at the end of a trip. Keep your seat-belt fastened during take-off and landing. a crash/emergency landing: The pilot was forced to make an emergency landing. a. the action of hitting the ground when you fall or jump from somewhere high. The thick grass gave me a soft landing. II. [countable] the area at the top of a set of stairs or between the sections of a set of stairs. In a house or other building, the landing is the area at the top of the staircase which has rooms leading off it. I ran out onto the landing. the third-floor landing. III. [countable] an attack by soldiers arriving somewhere by boat. the Grenada landings. IV. landing or landing place [countable] a place where you can leave a boat. stairwell 电梯井 a shaft in a building in which a staircase is built. "the stairwell echoed with the sounds of pounding feet". A stairway, staircase, stairwell, flight of stairs, or simply stairs, is a construction designed to bridge a large vertical distance by dividing it into smaller vertical distances, called steps. Stairs may be straight, round, or may consist of two or more straight pieces connected at angles. Special types of stairs include escalators and ladders. Some alternatives to stairs are elevators (lifts in British English), stairlifts and inclined moving walkways as well as stationary inclined sidewalks (pavements in British English). Landing or Platform: A landing is the area of a floor near the top or bottom step of a stair. An intermediate landing is a small platform that is built as part of the stair between main floor levels and is typically used to allow stairs to change directions, or to allow the user a rest. A half landing is where a 180° change in direction is made, and a quarter landing is where a 90° change in direction is made (on an intermediate landing). As intermediate landings consume floor space they can be expensive to build. However, changing the direction of the stairs allows stairs to fit where they would not otherwise, or provides privacy to the upper level as visitors downstairs cannot simply look up the stairs to the upper level due to the change in direction. The word 'landing' is also commonly used for a general corridor in any of the floors above the ground floor of a building, even if that corridor is located well away from a staircase. ). The poor old guy's been walking up the stairs for half an hour. It's really you. (On the third floor landing) Leonard: Mr. Jeffries, I am so sorry. We should've told you about the broken elevator. Arthur: I agree. Sheldon: Professor Proton, it's an honour to meet you. Arthur: Just, just call me Arthur. Sheldon: Leonard, you hear that? Professor Proton said I should call him Arthur. That means we're friends. Arthur: No. A friend would've told me about the elevator. Sheldon: Look at me. I can get as close to you as I want without my mom saying it's going to ruin my eyes. Arthur: Is he dangerous? Leonard: Actually, he's a genius. Sheldon: I am. Arthur: That doesn't answer my question. Leonard: Mr. Jeffries, I'm Leonard. This is my girlfriend, Penny. Arthur: Hi. Penny: Hello. Arthur: Well, I hope I haven't kept the kids waiting too long for, for the show. Sheldon: Oh, no, there are no kids. No, the, the show's for me. Come on. I'll race ya, Arthur. Arthur: Is the, is the blonde girl really your, your girlfriend? Leonard: Yes, sir. Arthur: You're the genius. (Back in the Apartment) Penny: So, do you do a lot of appearances 露面 like this? Arthur: It, it's hard to say. I'm still trying to figure out what, what this is. We just wanted to hang out with you and maybe learn a little about your life. Well, there really isn't too much to tell. After the TV show was canceled, nobody in the scientific world would take me seriously. So I was forced to do these, uh, children's parties to make a living 谋生, 养活自己. That's too bad. But still, working with kids-- it must be rewarding 很有收获, 收获良多, 很有收益. You get bit a lot. Let me see if I have this straight 看看我是不是搞错了, 看看我是不是误解了(get sth straight If you get something straight, you make sure that you understand it properly or that someone else does. You need to get your facts straight 搞清楚事实. Let's get things straight. I didn't lunch with her. ). You two are physicists, and you want me to do a children's science show? Yes. And if there's time, take 12 pictures with us in seasonal clothing. You know, I'm a real scientist. I have a PhD from Cornell University. Yeah, that's great. Did you bring your puppet? Arthur: No, no. I, I hate that puppet. Sheldon: Oh, no. How could anybody hate Gino the Neutrino? It's nice, huh? I got him for 20 bucks on eBay. Including the shipping! Arthur: I'm, I'm awake, right? Th, this is happening? Scene: Bernadette's car. Bernadette: Cinnamon! Howard: Cinnamon! Bernadette: You know, maybe she doesn't recognize her name because of Raj's accent. Howard: Good thinking 想的对, 说得对. (In a bad Indian accent) Cinnamon, come to Daddy. Bernadette (likewise): Cinnamon. Where are you, my little lamb chop? Howard: Nice. Bernadette: Thanks. Howard: When this all blows over 消停, 风平浪静, 都过去后 ( If something such as trouble or an argument blows over, it ends without any serious consequences. Wait, and it'll all blow over. ), remember that voice. It's kind of a turn-on. Bernadette: It turns you on when I sound like Raj? Howard: Cinnamon! Scene: The apartment. Arthur: Okay, as, as I put the egg on top, and, and the flame goes out and, and, and the air pressure decreases in, in the flask, what do you think will happen? Penny: I think I know. Sheldon: It's gonna get sucked in. It's going to get sucked in. Penny: Okay, I didn't know. Sheldon: Yes. Penny: See, I'm not a scientist like them. Arthur: I figured that out. Sheldon: Potato clock. Do potato clock. Penny: What's that? Arthur: I power a clock with a, with a potato. Penny: Shut up. You can do that? I mean, wouldn't that solve the world's energy crisis? Arthur: No. Look, guys, keep your money. I think, I think I'm done. Sheldon: What, well what's wrong? Is she upsetting you? Because I can make her go away. Arthur: No, she's the only reason I've stayed this long. Leonard: Then what is it? Arthur: I don't know. I think I'm, I just don't want to be Professor Proton any more. Sheldon: Well, how can you say that? Professor Proton's the best. Arthur: What, what has it ever gotten me 给了我什么, 带给了我什么? I mean, I'm an 83-year-old man who has potatoes in, in his suitcase. Other scientists, think I'm a joke. And the, the puppeteer who did Gino, well, he also did my wife. Sheldon: Mr. Jeffries, I need to show you something. Penny: I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. Arthur: Uh, thanks. Penny: But if you don't mind me asking, uh, the potato clock, how does it work? Is it a trick clock or a trick potato 变戏法用的, 特制的( trick I. used for tricking someone. a trick question. II. American used about a part of the body that is weak and that does not work the way it should. a trick knee. one-trick pony someone who can do only one thing well or is interested in only one thing. Unlike some Eurosceptic Tories, Mr Carswell is not a one-trick pony. not/never miss a trick 错失良机 to notice every opportunity and use it. they always know what is happening and take advantage of every situation. When it comes to integrating their transport systems, the French don't miss a trick. Oscar, who never misses a trick, noticed the letter and asked what it was about. a trick of the light If you say that something is a trick of the light, you mean that what you are seeing is an effect caused by the way that the light falls on things, and does not really exist in the way that it appears. Her head appears to be on fire but that is only a trick of the light. every trick in the book If someone tries every trick in the book, they try every possible thing that they can think of in order to achieve something. [informal] Companies are using every trick in the book to stay one step in front of their competitors. tricks of the trade The tricks of the trade are the quick and clever ways of doing something that are known by people who regularly do a particular activity. We asked five successful writers to reveal some of the tricks of the trade. you can't teach an old dog new tricks If you say 'You can't teach an old dog new tricks', you are suggesting that someone is unwilling to try new ways of doing things. up to one's tricks = up to one's old tricks If you say that someone is up to their tricks or up to their old tricks, you disapprove of them because they are behaving in the dishonest or deceitful way in which they typically behave. [informal, disapproval] I have no respect for my father who, having remarried, is still up to his old tricks. can't take a trick Australian slang to be consistently unsuccessful or unlucky.)? Arthur: What do you two talk about? Sheldon: I wrote a fan letter to you when I was a child in Texas, and you sent this autographed picture back to me. Do you remember that? Arthur: I'll, I'll give you a hint. I have a bracelet with my own address on it. Sheldon: Well, anyway, um, you may find this hard to believe, but I didn't have any friends growing up. Arthur: No, I, I get that. Sheldon: But, um, I did have you. And every day at four o'clock, you'd come to my house on Channel 68, and we'd do science together. If it hadn't been for you, well, who knows what would've become of me 我会变成什么? You know? Instead of a world-class physicist, I could've wound up as a hobo. Or a surgeon. Leonard: I bet there are important discoveries being made every day because you inspired millions of kids to pursue science. In a way, their discoveries are your discoveries. Sheldon: Yeah, it's true. A generation of young scientists are standing on your shoulders. Arthur: Well, thank, thank you, guys. That, that, that means a lot. Leonard: It's important you know how much you mean to us. Arthur: Uh-oh. Penny: Arthur, are you okay? Arthur: I'm having a problem with my pacemaker. Leonard: I'll, I'll call for help. Penny: Any chance we could plug it into the potato? Arthur: No. Scene: The telescope lab. Raj's phone rings. Raj: Hello? What do you mean, you found my dog? She's with my friends. Is she okay? Oh, thank you. Uh, just text me your address, I'm on my way. Oh, and if she's hungry, go ahead and feed her. But do not give her anything starchy. She's having risotto for dinner. Scene: The apartment. Paramedic: Your vitals 生命体征 are stable, but let's take you in for some tests just to be safe. Leonard: You want one of us to go with you in the ambulance? Sheldon: I'll do it. Arthur: He's not a relative, he's not allowed, right? Paramedic: No, that's not a rule. He can go. Sheldon: Oh, yeah. Arthur: I can't catch a break today. Penny: We'll pack up your stuff and meet you at the hospital. Leonard: I'm sorry things turned out this way 变成这样, 事情发展成这样, 以这样结束. Arthur: Well, at, at this point, I'm just glad someone's carrying me down the stairs. Sheldon: Met my childhood hero, now I get to ride in an ambulance. Boy, if we can get him to do that calendar, this'll be the best day ever. Scene: Howard and Bernadette's apartment. Bernadette: Can't believe we lost her. What was I thinking? I'd be a terrible mom. Howard: Well, maybe with the first one. But kids are like pancakes. The first one's always a throwaway 试验品. How's this look? Bernadette: It's fine. Where'd you get that picture of her? Howard: It's not her. I just googled foo-foo little dogs. (Skype tone) It's Raj. Stay quiet. Hey, bad timing. Bernadette just took Cinnamon out for a walk. Raj: Hmm. Interesting. Did they take a walk down Liars' Lane? Howard: What? Raj: A lane frequented by liars. Like you, you big liar. Howard: You have her? Bernadette: Oh, thank God she's okay. Raj: Well, I trusted you, and you let me down. The poor thing's been shaking for hours. Howard: I'm really sorry. Bernadette: Hang on, you've had her for hours? Raj: Yes. I picked her up, and then we both went for massages to try and calm down. And then we got Pinkberry. Bernadette: So you knew she was okay, and you couldn't pick up the phone to tell us? Raj: Well, I, I thought about… Bernadette: Don't well me, mister. We've been worried sick. She could have been dead for all we knew. You should be ashamed of yourself. Raj: Sorry. I, I just. Bernadette: Sorry's not good enough. Maybe you need to take some time and think about what you've done. Howard: Nice guilt trip. You are gonna be an amazing mom. Scene: A hospital room. Sheldon: Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr. Arthur: Thank you, Sheldon. That was very nice. Want me to sing it again? No. The fourth, the fourth time was the charm (Third time is a charm is an idiom which means on your third try you're likely to succeed after failing two times. ... 'third time's a charm' or 'third time's the charm' is an idiom - there isn't a correlating first, second or fourth time. A similar expression is 'third time lucky'.). There anything I can get for you? Some apple juice? Uh, some Jell-O? No. No, thank you. But I do I do have a favor to ask. Name it 有话就说吧(Penny: Oh, okay. Well, I was hoping, um, you could do me a favour. Stuart: Sure, yeah, name it 帮什么忙, 说吧. Penny: Well, I'm kind of responsible for Sheldon missing Stan Lee, and I really want to make it up to him. So I was hoping you could give me his phone number so maybe I can arrange for them to meet). Well, I'm booked to do a children's party tomorrow, and, um, frankly I, you know, I don't feel up to it 觉着做不了了, 应付不来了. Oh, you're not. You look awful. Thank you. Anyway, uh I mean, you know my act better than anybody. I was hoping that maybe you'd fill in for me. Are you saying that you want me to be Professor Proton? Yeah. Oh, my. What an honor. Oh, this is like being asked to ascend Mount Olympus and dine with the gods. Arthur: Or a Korean family in Alhambra. Sheldon: But they'll know I'm not you. Should I call myself Professor Proton, Jr.? Arthur: Sounds great. Sheldon: So, in a way it's like I'm your son. Arthur: What, Whatever. Sheldon: Father. Arthur: Sure, what the hell.