'I told a mother at the pool I was a working mum. Her reaction was gut-wrenching 心如刀绞的.': Something magical happens when you become a mum. That invisible social boundary that stops strangers talking to one another vanishes and you find yourself having deep personal conversations with other mums without even exchanging names. And for the best part, these chats are fuelled by a camaraderie that comes from a shared experience of childbirth, navigating life with a newborn and surviving the whole parent thing. Really, there's nothing more levelling (无论身份和地位)大家都感同身受的 ( Levelling (British English) or leveling (American English); is a branch of surveying, the object of which is to establish or verify or measure the height of specified points relative to a datum. It is widely used in cartography to measure geodetic height, and in construction to measure height differences of construction artifacts. level adj. I. having no part higher than another; having a flat or even surface. II. 齐平的. filled to a height even with the rim of a container: a level teaspoon of salt. III. mentally well-balanced; sensible; rational: to keep a level head in a crisis. ) than parenthood. But sometimes you stumble upon a bad apple(one bad apple spoils the (whole) barrel = one bad apple ruins the whole bunch 一块肉坏一锅汤 It only takes one person, thing, element, etc., to ruin the entire group, situation, project, etc. Refers to the fact that a rotting apple can cause other apples in close proximity to begin to rot as well. A: "It used to be considered the top research facility in the region, but after one of its researchers was discovered to have plagiarized a number of his papers, the whole department's reputation has been dragged through the mud." B: "Well, just one bad apple spoils the barrel." I really loved my job, but there was this one jerk there who made life miserable for everyone. One bad apple spoils the whole barrel, unfortunately.). A rotten egg, let's say. A mamma who takes on the snivelling ( snivel [snɪvəl] 嗤之以鼻 I. If someone is snivelling, they are crying or sniffing in a way that irritates you. to cry or to complain, especially in a way that seems weak or annoying. Billy started to snivel. His mother smacked his hand. ...a journalist snivelling with the flu. Carol managed a few proper snivels for the sake of appearance. II. to behave or speak in a weak complaining way, especially when you are crying A small boy was sniveling on a chair. a snivelling coward. III. To breathe heavily through the nose while it is congested with nasal mucus; to sniffle. IV. (derogatory, transitive) To cry while sniffling; to whine or complain while crying. To say (something) while sniffling or crying. ) superiority of a competitor. Someone who thinks they're winning and you're losing, and is happy to let you know this. I met one of these unsavoury 倒胃口的, 可憎的(If you describe a person, place, or thing as unsavoury, you mean that you find them unpleasant or morally unacceptable. [disapproval] The sport has long been associated with illegal wagers and unsavoury characters.) types recently. It was the first day of swim school for our two-year-olds and we were sat like a pair of half-dressed lemons, waiting to be called into the pool with our toddlers. The usuals were swapped. Age of child; temperament; where we lived; had we slept; had we forgotten the horrors of childbirth yet. And with each exchange, she appeared to be gaining momentum in her marvellousness as a mother. This in itself isn't a bad thing. I like mums who are owning it 掌控一切, 一切尽在掌握. It's often a revitalising( revitalise 起死复生的 [ˌriˈvaɪt(ə)lˌaɪz] I. to make something that is failing or weak become strong and successful again. an expansion program to revitalize the company. II. to make your skin or hair look healthy again. a. to make someone feel healthy again. ) alternative to the usual tired-off, where two mums battle to the death 死拼, 力拼, 比拼 about how sleep deprived they are. But then I asked, is he in daycare? A simple question, really. "Oh no, I'm one of the lucky ones," she said smugly and with a heavy dose of condescension. "I don't really believe in having kids and then paying someone else to look after them. Do you have to work?" I outwardly winced at these words offered so casually but oh so critically. Annoyingly though I didn't get to answer because we were beckoned into the class. But as I swished ( swish verb I. If something swishes or if you swish it, it moves quickly through the air, making a soft sound. A car swished by heading for the coast. He swished his cape around his shoulders. He heard a swishing sound. She turned with a swish of her skirt. [+ of] II. to pass through the basket without hitting the hoop or backboard said of a ball. adj. If you describe something as swish, you mean that it is smart and fashionable. [British, informal, old-fashioned] ...a swish cocktail bar. ) my child around that highly-chlorinated, highly-urinated pool, I kept thinking about her scornful words. I've experienced both. I have stayed at home full time with a baby and I'm now juggling life as a working mum. And not once have I looked longingly at stay-at-home mums and wanted to swap places. Not because I think I'm better. Not because I think working mums are superior. But because personally I found staying at home with a child to be hard work, completely undervalued, totally relentless and at times, absolutely boring. I found that child-rearing hours were a bit like dog years. For every hour I spent with my child, three has passed in the outside world. You know the one, it's occupied by adults with freshly washed hair and clothes on the right way, going to jobs, using public transport. So I've always hailed the women who stay at home as modern-day heroes as I know, firsthand, that it's no easy feat 不是简单事. And for me, eight months with my much-loved and very adorable son was enough and I was ready to go back to work. But it's the plight of the working mum which is very trendy right now. Headlines are generated daily about our struggles. And a recent study found that we're 40 percent more stressed than our at-home counterparts. But let's go on the record here: it's actually a joy to juggle. I love that I've got two worlds that are so distinctly different from each other. I love that I can have an uninterrupted conversation or come up for air after delving into a piece work and find that hours have whizzed past with ease. I love picking my son up from daycare and seeing the joy on his face equals the joy in my heart at being reunited. And then spending a few hours in each other's company each evening as we count down to the weekend which is our time. I feel extremely lucky because my set-up is working. And I don't doubt that this pool-side mum-shamer feels equally lucky because her decision works for her. But since our exchange, I keep thinking: Why can't we celebrate each other's decisions rather than using them to mum shame? After all, imagine if this openly critical mum had simply said, "Aren't we privileged to have the choice between working and not working?" We could have had a lovely chat about how fortunate we are to have so many options. We could have discussed how our parents and their parents didn't have so much flexibility when it came to child-rearing. And I could have had the chance to say that I wasn't cut out for stay-at-home parenting and she might have offered that she didn't have the inclination to do the daily juggle of a working mum. But sadly, not all parents want to play level. Some mums want to shame other mums as they sit half-naked next to a pool that's 80 percent toddler pee. Some mums really aren't part of the squad. And that's okay because here's the thing, since becoming a parent I've noticed that judgement is readily available but it really does lose its strength if you don't give a f*ck. Instead I ask myself one simple question, am I making the right choice for me and my family? If the answer is yes then I know everything else is just noise and the thing with noise is this: You can always turn it down or just off and then listen to something else. Something sweeter that compliments you as you do the hardest job there is, in what ever way you choose.
Code Case: 1. After the divorce, he just stopped coming by. Something else you want to share? Not particularly. "Whatever, right? Is there anything else you can tell us about Justin? He was a runaway, sick of foster homes. On his own since forever. He had you. Truth is, I met Justin two weeks ago. Barely knew the kid. You a regular at the train station? Hardly. Sure about that? Yeah, positive. Because these two kids, you know wonderbread suburbs boy (white bread blandly conventional in a way that is regarded as characteristic of the white middle classes. "inoffensive white-bread comedies". wonderbread (pejorative, slang, ethnic slur) A white person), broke-ass 一无所有的穷光蛋 (A person with meager resources especially financial ones) nobody. There's nothing in common, right? Right. Except they're both 17. 2. There's a point you have to accept like Justin did that it's over. We know he buries them where they ask. Someplace important to them. For Steve, it was where he hit his first home run. For Justin, the field he rode horses with his mom. Same field where he said music was playing. Music, horses that's a weird combination. Whatever Justin had in his locker had to be important to him. Significant somehow. There's nothing here but junk. Tickets like you'd find at a fairground. So Horses, music, fair, tickets. Merry-go-round. How many are there in Philly? I know a few. Veronica makes me 让我做某事 take her. 3. Justin was standing right there. Talking about horses in the field. Cheap bastards 小气鬼, 抠门的人 could turn up the heat in their rides, know what I'm saying? I'm jacking the next one and riding off into the sunset. Yeah, sure. Two-bit hooker ( two-bit whore Two-bit is from early american times when money was sperated in "bits" equal to about 12.5 cents a piece, a common price for alot of items was two-bits, or 25 cents. Thus, an old-fashoined way of identifiyng someone as a 25-cent whore. A guy walks in and sits down at a bar. The side of his face is bruised and bleeding so the bartender asks, "What in the world happened to you, buddy?". The guy says, "Oh, I got in a fight with my girlfriend and I called her a two-bit whore." "Yeah?" asks the bartender. "What did she do?" ) like you, Justin, you'll get real far. If I take the back roads, the cops will never catch me, boy. That's right. Saw it in that movie, Thelma and Louise. Those white girls end up flying off the cliff at the end. Is that how you want to blaze out ( blaze out move rapidly and as if blazing. "The spaceship blazed out into space" blaze noun I. A blaze of publicity or attention is a great amount of it. He was arrested in a blaze of publicity. ...the sporting career that began in a blaze of glory. II. A blaze is a large fire which is difficult to control and which destroys a lot of things. Two firefighters were hurt in a blaze which swept through a tower block last night. blaze verb I. If something blazes with light or colour, it is extremely bright. The gardens blazed with colour. I wanted the front garden to be a blaze of colour. II. If someone's eyes are blazing with an emotion, or if an emotion is blazing in their eyes, their eyes look very bright because they are feeling that emotion so strongly. He got to his feet and his dark eyes were blazing with anger. Eva stood up and indignation blazed in her eyes. His eyes blazed intently into mine. Miss Turner turned blazing eyes on the victim. III. If guns blaze, or blaze away, they fire continuously, making a lot of noise. Guns were blazing, flares going up and the sky was lit up all around. She took the gun and blazed away with calm and deadly accuracy. IV. When a fire blazes, it burns strongly and brightly. Three people died as wreckage blazed, and rescuers fought to release trapped drivers. The log fire was blazing merrily. ...a blazing fire. with guns blazing 火力全开 or with all guns blazing If you come out with guns blazing or with all guns blazing, you put all your effort and energy into trying to achieve something. The company came out with guns blazing. to blaze a trail If someone blazes a trail, they discover or develop something new. These surgeons have blazed the trail in the treatment of bomb victims. brazen out 厚着脸皮, 当没事人似的 If you have done something wrong and you brazen it out, you behave confidently in order not to appear ashamed, even though you probably do feel ashamed. If you are caught simply argue that 'everyone does it' and brazen it out. The president brazened out his misdeeds. He would brazen the matter out and he would do so in the most robust manner possible. )? Whatever. You're tripping 做梦, 异想天开. At least I got a plan. Don't be scamming my lighter 顺走, yo. Give it back. I don't want your cheap-ass plastic light. 4. Me and Justin kick it time to time. So what? He work the train station, too, Valentino? You mean, is he hooking? Take a guess, Chico. When did you see him last? Earlier tonight. I don't know. Was he with this guy? I ain't no snitch. Ask him your own damn self. It's all the same to you, I gotta make a living here. 5. Some people don't have a loving family and a cozy home to say good-bye to, but Steve did. We held up our end (hold up one's end 履行诺言, 说到做到 (idiomatic) To hold up one's end of a bargain; to fulfill one's promise or obligation. I'm holding up my end and you had better hold up yours.). Now it's your turn. Where is he? Some people just have a locker to call home. And a vent to keep them warm at night. You talking about yourself, John? Or him? A locker to call home. This boy's what? Homeless? Runaway? A vent keeping them warm at night. Subway station? Or a train station. Guy's the invisible man. No one's seen squat. If this John Doe was even here. Could be a wild goose chase. Heating vents, lockers. You got a better idea? This guy could be jerking us around. Better than doing nothing, because we're running out of time.
look on A as B VS think of A as B. VS consider VS regard: 1. think of somebody/something as somebody/something to consider somebody/something in a particular way I think of this place as my home. She is thought of as a possible director. well thought of 高度评价 considered by other people as good; admired, and approved of: He was efficient at his job and well thought of by everyone. [ before noun ] It's a well-thought-of school. 2. look on/upon sb/sth as sth 被认为是 to consider or think of someone or something as something: She's looked on as the leading authority on the subject. We looked on her as a daughter. I've lived there so long I look on the town as my home. 3. consider I. 考虑可能性. 考虑做决定. to spend time thinking about a possibility or making a decision: Don't make any decisions before you've considered the situation. Have you considered what you'll do if you don't get the job? We're considering selling the house. She's being considered for the job. I'd like some time to consider before I make a decision. Would you consider fostering a child? The council is considering banning vehicles from the town centre to relieve congestion. "Have you decided what to do?" "No, I'm still considering the various possibilities." I considered applying to university, but I eventually decided to go to the local poly. Have you ever considered a career in the police force? II. 虑及. 考虑进去. 算进去. to give attention to a particular subject or fact when judging something else: You've got to consider the time element when planning the whole project. If you consider how long he's been learning the piano, he's not very good. III. 考虑到. 照顾到. to care about or respect other people or their feelings and wishes: Did you consider your mother and how she's going to feel about you leaving? She never considers anyone but herself - she's totally selfish! IV. to believe someone or something to be, or think of him, her, or it as something: He is currently considered (to be) the best British athlete. We don't consider her to be right for the job. [ passive + obj + to infinitive] It is considered bad manners in some cultures to speak with your mouth full of food. I consider myself lucky that I only hurt my arm in the accident. Do you consider him a friend of yours? [ + (that) ] She considers (that) she has done enough to help already. be highly/well considered 评级很高, 很认可, 被认可 to be very much admired: I don't like her books, but I know she's very highly considered. 4. regard 被认为是 verb I. If you regard someone or something as being a particular thing or as having a particular quality, you believe that they are that thing or have that quality. He was regarded as the most successful Chancellor of modern times. [be VERB-ed + as] I regard creativity both as a gift and as a skill. II. If you regard something or someone with a feeling such as dislike or respect, you have that feeling about them. They regarded him with a mixture of fondness and alarm. Displays of emotion are regarded with suspicion. He was a highly regarded scholar. III. If you regard someone in a certain way, you look at them in that way. She regarded him curiously for a moment. The clerk regarded him with benevolent amusement. regard noun I. If you have regard for someone or something, you respect them and care about them. If you hold someone in high regard, you have a lot of respect for them. I have a very high regard for him and what he has achieved. There were armed people about, people with little regard for human life. The Party ruled the country without regard for the people's views. II. Regards are greetings. You use regards in expressions such as best regards and with kind regards as a way of expressing friendly feelings towards someone, especially in a letter or email. [formulae] Give my regards to your family. [+ to] My best regards to Mary. 5. Consider or regard? Consider and regard can both mean 'believe' or 'realise' or 'understand'. When they mean 'believe' or 'realise' or 'understand', we don't often use the continuous forms. Consider: Consider takes several different patterns. Consider + that-clause: When you consider that she was very scared, her story is even more remarkable. Consider + object + to be: They consider him to be the best chef in the country. Consider + object + to have: The ministry of trade considered the company to have the best vision for exports. Warning: We don't use as with consider: We consider this to be a very serious issue.