Leonard:
I was reading about this jellyfish that never dies. Instead, it
reverts to its asexual state and then grows up again. Howard: We
thought my 90-year-old grandfather had reverted to an asexual state,
but the lawsuit from his Jamaican caregiver proved us all wrong.
Leonard: My point is, immortality is not only a possibility, it is
real. Raj: Only if you're this jellyfish which periodically reverts
to a mass of undifferentiated protoplasm. Sheldon: If I could keep my
Gmail account, I'd be okay with that. Barry: – Hello, fellas. All:
Hey. Barry: Remember when we were trying to figure out what that
smell coming from Professor Tupperman's office was? Howard: Yeah?
Barry: Turns out it was Tupperman. Dead at his desk for two weeks.
Howard: That's terrible. Leonard: Oh, my God. Barry: In lieu of
flowers, the department chair 系主任 is asking that everyone donate a bottle
of Febreze. Sheldon: If we're going to change the topic from
jellyfish, I'd be okay with brine shrimp or the history of the
unicycle. Howard: Show a little compassion 有点同情心好不, a man died. Barry: And
turned into a puddle of goo. Now, we can either sit around and cry
over spilt professor, or we can rejoice in the knowledge that a
tenured position( tenure 终身教授 [ˈtenjər] I. education a university teacher who has tenure can stay in their job permanently, usually after they have taught for a particular number of years. II. the period of time during which someone has an important job or is an elected official. III. legal someone's right to live on land and own it. ) has just opened up 有空缺. I choose to do the latter.
Sheldon: Excuse me, the whole tenure system is ridiculous. A
guaranteed job for life only encourages the faculty 教职工 to become
complacent. If we really want science to advance, people should have
chips implanted in their skulls that explode when they say something
stupid. Raj: Well, I believe people do their best work when they feel
safe and secure. Sheldon: Pchew! Barry: If you need my nose, you'll
find it firmly lodged up the rectum of the tenure committee. Howard:
You Ph.D's gonna go suck up like Kripke? Leonard: No. I mean, I'll
apply, but I'm not gonna stoop to 屈尊降贵, 贬低身份, 委屈自己, 自贬身份 playing politics( stoop I. If you stoop, you stand or walk with your shoulders bent forwards. She was taller than he was and stooped slightly. He was a tall, thin fellow with a slight stoop. ...a slender slightly stooping American. II. If you stoop, you bend your body forwards and downwards. He stooped 弯腰 to pick up the carrier bag of groceries. Two men in shirt sleeves stooped over the car. Stooping down, he picked up a big stone and hurled it. III. If you say that a person stoops to doing something, you are criticizing them because they do something wrong or immoral that they would not normally do. He had not, until recently, stooped to personal abuse. They've stooped to using any and every weapon at their disposal. How could anyone stoop so low? noun. A stoop is a small platform at the door of a building, with steps leading up to it. They stood together on the stoop and rang the bell. wiki 前台, 阳台: In urban architecture, a stoop is a small staircase ending in a platform and leading to the entrance of an apartment building or other building. Traditionally, in North American cities, the stoop served an important function as a spot for brief, incidental social encounters. Homemakers, children, and other household members would sit on the stoop outside their home to relax, and greet neighbors passing by. Similarly, while on an errand, one would stop and converse with neighbors sitting on their stoops. Within an urban community, stoop conversations helped to disseminate gossip and reaffirm casual relationships. Similarly, it was the place that children would congregate to play stoop ball. Urbanites lacking yards often hold stoop sales instead of yard sales. ). Raj: Yeah, me
neither. It should be about the work. And if I can't get tenure, I'd
like to see you or Sheldon get it. Sheldon: Raj, don't dangle false
hope in front of Leonard like that. Leonard: Excuse me, but I think
I'm just as qualified as you are. Sheldon: Pchew! Pchew! Pchew!
Pchew! Penny: So tenured 终身制的
means a job for life? Leonard: Yup. Penny: You can't get fired even
if you're bad at it? Leonard: Mm, not really. Penny: Wow, sounds a
lot like being a pretty waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. Sheldon: While I disagree with the premise of tenure,
if they gave it to me, it wouldn't diminish 减少我的付出 my output. You know, I'm
like the sun. Can't turn this off. Amy: Are Rajesh and Leonard
competing for it as well? Sheldon: Mm-hmm. Amy: Do they know they
don't stand a chance 'cause you're so great? Sheldon: Well put 说得好. You
know, I must say I go back and forth on this boyfriend-girlfriend
thing, but those moments when you worship me really keep you in the
running 让你不被淘汰( have someone on the run 比...占优势 If you have an opponent on the run, you are performing better than them or are in a stronger position, and can control their actions and defeat them. It is clear that the Opposition thinks it has him on the run. We've got the Government on the run and we'll keep them on the run. Note: You can also say that someone is on the run. They sensed their opponents were on the run. get (one's) motor running I. To make one excited. Listening to classic rock songs just gets my motor running—I love trying to pick out all the different instruments being used! Stamp collecting doesn't interest me in the slightest, but it really gets Bill's motor running. II. vulgar slang To cause one to become sexually aroused. His French accent really gets my motor running! keep pace (with) I. to develop or progress at the same rate as something else. The government is not allowing salaries to keep pace with inflation. II. to move at the same speed as someone or something else. Ron had to run to keep pace with Guido. give someone a (good) run for their money to compete very well against someone so that it is hard for them to defeat you. A new phone company is giving the others a run for their money.). Raj: It would be
nice to have the increased 增加收入 income. Stop taking money from my parents.
Howard: Money from family does come with strings attached. Raj: You
have no idea. They buy me a new BMW for my birthday but can I get
seat warmers? No. Rajesh, if you want a warm butt, you're gonna have
to pay for it yourself. Well, maybe I will, old man. Bernadette: I
think that's enough wine for now. Leonard:
I just keep thinking about how cool it would be if I called my mom
and told her that I got tenure at Caltech. Penny: She'd be proud,
huh? Leonard: Oh, very. Assuming she takes my call. Sheldon: My primary concern with being granted tenure is
living with an insanely jealous roommate after the fact 事后. I might need
to sleep with a gun under my pillow. Or a chainsaw. Amy: Or you take
advantage of your newfound economic stability and move out, buy a
house, get married. start a family. Sheldon: Or, the chainsaw. Raj: And I will return to New
Delhi in triumph atop a bejeweled white elephant. And you know what
will be on that elephant's back? A seat warmer. No, Father, you may
not have a ride. Bernadette: I'm gonna make some coffee. Penny: So, who do you have to schmooze 巴结 (brown-nose someone. 献殷勤, 献媚, 谄媚, curry favor with, suck up, schmooze someone 混熟脸, 装熟, cozy up to. ingratiate oneself with. ) ( [ʃmuːz] If you schmooze, you talk casually and socially with someone. to talk with someone in a friendly and informal way, often with the intention of gaining an advantage or of persuading them to do something that you want. ...those coffee houses where you can schmooze for hours. ) to get this
deal? Leonard: I'm not gonna schmooze anybody. I'm gonna let my work
speak for itself. Penny: That's great. That shows a lot of integrity.
Leonard: Thank you. I'm a naive idiot, right? Penny: Oh, good, you
heard me. Amy: You know, if you really want
tenure, maybe you should cozy up to the people making the decision.
Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not do cozy. Amy: You don't say.
Sheldon: But I suppose it wouldn't hurt to know who's on the
committee. Let's see. Oh, Janine Davis. Oh, dear. Amy: Is that a
problem? Sheldon: Well… (Flashback to Series 6, Episode 12, The Egg
Salad Equivalency) Sheldon: Even you. You're a slave. Janine: I'm a
what? (End of flashback) Sheldon: I'm not sure, it could go either
way. Scene: The university gymnasium. Leonard: Hey-hey-hey-hey-hey.
Mrs. Davis. Janine: Hey. Leonard: Hey. Janine: Dr. Hofstadter.
Leonard: Yeah. Just thought I'd come down and start getting ready for
swimsuit season. Janine: Good for you. Leonard: Not that you need it.
I bet you look great in a swimsuit. Janine: Thank you. Leonard: I've
got what my father used to call furniture disease. My chest is
falling into my drawers. I'm not, uh, familiar with this model. How
do I make it start? Janine: You push start. Leonard: Right. This one
might be broken. Janine: You have to move. Leonard: Got it. Oh.
There. Oh, yeah. Yeah, now I'm feeling it. Oh, this is great. I could
do this for the rest of my life. Hey, speaking, speaking of things
you do for the rest of your life, uh, did I read that you're on that tenure committee? Janine: Yep. I got to get a home gym.
Leonard: Well, I'm sure you have a lot of good applicants, I just
wanted to say hi and let you know that I'll be throwing my hat in the
ring. Janine: All right, I'll keep an eye out for that. Leonard:
Yeah. Barry: Hey, Hofstadter. Funny seeing you here for the first
time in… ever. Leonard: Go away. Barry: Janine the Machine, let's
do this! Janine: Hey, Barry. Leonard: Well, look at that. Burned a
whole calorie. Barry: I guess you got here early to burn off that
banana bread I baked you. Janine: Yeah, it was delicious. Thank you.
Barry: No, my pleasure. Leonard: Oh, if you, if you like banana
bread, I've got a great recipe. The trick is in, in fresh ground,
I'll e-mail it to you. Barry: Aw wight, I'm warm. Ready to kick it up
a notch? Janine: Let's go. Leonard: That's enough cardio for me. I'm
just gonna stretch out before I hit the weights. Janine: You okay?
Leonard: Call someone. Scene: Janine's office. There is a sound on
her computer. It opens up an online video. Raj: Good day, Mrs. Davis.
This is Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali from the astrophysics department.
Don't be alarmed 别吓着你, I'm not really in space. Anywho, I'd like to take
this opportunity to tell you about myself, so sit back, relax and
enjoy the following 90-minute video. Janine: Oh, come on. Raj: Born
in New Delhi, the third son of an itinerant ( [aɪˈtɪnərənt] traveling around frequently, especially in order to get work. itinerant workers. itinerant physician: A physician who travels from his/her home community to an eligible rural community to provide outreach/direct patient services. ) gynecologist, I showed
early signs of genius. At the age of five I discovered a celestial
object which later turned out to be the moon. Shelldon (off): (Knock,
knock, knock) Mrs Davis? (Knock, knock, knock) Mrs Davis? (Knock,
knock, knock) Mrs Davis? Janine: God, they're everywhere. Come in.
Dr. Cooper, how can I help you? Sheldon: Yes, hello. I'm fine. Um, I
understand you may have a bad impression of me, so I bought you a
gift. Janine: Uh, Dr. Cooper, that's not necessary. Sheldon: It's too
late. Get ready to like me. Janine: Roots? Sheldon: The tragic
history of slavery in America. Fun for the whole family. Janine: Why
would you think this is an appropriate gift? Sheldon: Um… Well…
You are black, right? Janine: This meeting has come to an end.
Sheldon: Because you want to start watching it right now. Copy that.
Let's see. Up next on the tenure committee is Professor Wu. Well, get
ready for the complete works 全集, 全部作品 of Jackie Chan. Scene: The cafeteria.
Leonard: Gentlemen. Raj: Where have you been? Leonard: Nurse's
office. Howard: Asthma attack? Leonard: Asthma, heart, some kind of
attack. I'm fine, though. Howard: You guys going to Professor
Tupperman's memorial? Raj: I don't know. Leonard: Probably not.
Sheldon: Barely knew him. Howard: Yeah, you wouldn't want to look
like you guys are brown-nosing ( to be abjectly subservient (to); curry favour (with). ) the tenure committee, who will all be
there. Oh, yeah, that's what I was hoping for, meerkats. Scene: The
apartment. Sheldon: I won't be able to make our date night this
Thursday, so, bad news for you. Amy: Well you better have a good
excuse this time, because trimming Q-tips to fit your ears right is
obvious nonsense. Sheldon: First of all, when you say things like
that, people think you're crazy. Second, the reason I'm cancelling is
because I have to attend a memorial service for Professor Tupperman.
Amy: It sounds like a long and tedious evening. Sheldon: Eh, it will
be. Honestly, if I must endure a long and tedious evening, I'd rather
it be with you on date night. But I have no choice. The tenure
committee's going to be there. Amy: Oh. Well, in that case, perhaps I
should come along 陪你一块去. Sheldon: Well, now that I think about it, that
would be most helpful. Amy: Of course it would. I'm well-versed 游刃有余 in
academic politics, and as a respected scientist, I can only raise
your stock as a candidate(Stock dilution, also known as equity dilution, is the decrease in existing shareholders’ ownership of a company as a result of the company issuing new equity. New equity increases the total shares outstanding which has a dilutive effect on the ownership percentage of existing shareholders. This increase in the number of shares outstanding can result from a primary market offering (including an initial public offering), employees exercising stock options, or by issuance or conversion of convertible bonds, preferred shares or warrants into stock. This dilution can shift fundamental positions of the stock such as ownership percentage, voting control, earnings per share, and the value of individual shares. ). Sheldon: Actually, I meant you could drive
me. But if it makes you happy, that other stuff, too. Scene: Penny's
apartment. Leonard: Do anything interesting today? Penny: Oh, not
really. I was out shopping with Amy. She wanted me to help her find
something for this memorial thing. Leonard: Wait, Sheldon's going to
be there? We all promised we weren't going to go. Penny: Oh, what a
jerk. Leonard: I know. I was hoping to go without anyone finding out.
Penny: Well, since Amy's going, do you want me there? You know, to
support you? Leonard: Oh, that's nice, but it's just gonna be a
room full of boring old men and I'm not sure how much help you'd be.
Penny: Okay. I'm just gonna tie my shoe while you think about that.
Leonard: Oh, yeah. No. Thanks, that would be great help. You realize
you might kill some of them. Penny: Oh, then you all can get tenure.
Scene: Raj's apartment. Raj: Come on, Daddy. All the other scientists
have seat warmers. This is so humiliating. I've got to get tenure.
Okay, let's meet halfway 各让一步. How about I cut my cleaning lady down to
twice a week? Looks like we're both going to be living like animals.
Scene: The memorial. Amy: Let's go over our emotional responses one
last time. Sheldon: Okay. Amy: Professor Tupperman is dead, and that
makes us? Sheldon: Sad. Amy: The fact that there are so many people
here tonight doesn't make us cranky and claustrophobic. It makes us?
Sheldon: Glad. Amy: Giving Mrs. Davis the box set of Roots was?
Sheldon: Bad. However… Amy: No. Sheldon: Fine. Bad. Raj:
Unbelievable. You have some nerve showing up here just to schmooze
with the tenure committee. Sheldon: You're here. Raj: Excuse me. I'm
here to pay my respects to Professor Tupperware, or whatever his name
is. Sheldon: So am I. His passing makes me feel bad. Leonard: Well,
well, well, Sheldon, fancy 奇怪竟然能够 meeting you here(fancy I. British informal to want to have or do something. What do you fancy for your lunch? I quite fancy the idea of lazing around. fancy doing something: Do you fancy going to the cinema? II. British informal to feel sexually attracted to someone. I think Steve fancies you! III. British informal to believe that someone will be successful in doing something, especially winning a competition or fight. fancy someone for something: I fancy Manchester United for the Cup this year. fancy your chances (for something): So, do you fancy your chances for tomorrow's game? fancy someone to do something: Oxford are strongly fancied to win this year's Boat Race. IV. literary to believe or imagine that something is true He sometimes fancied that he heard strange sounds. fancy yourself to believe that you are very attractive, clever, or good at something in a way that is annoying. You lot really fancy yourselves, don't you. fancy yourself (as) something to believe, usually wrongly, that you have the qualities or abilities of a particular person or type of person. She fancies herself as another Madonna. fancy that 奇怪你竟然 spoken used when you are very surprised about something. Fancy you knowing my sister! ). I guess the train store
in Glendale wasn't having a cotillion ( The cotillion (also cotillon or French country dance) is a social dance, popular in 18th-century Europe and America. Originally for four couples in square formation, it was a courtly version of an English country dance, the forerunner of the quadrille and, in the United States, the square dance 方形舞. In contemporary United States, most cotillion balls are for middle schoolers as a chance to teach manners and etiquette, and also are a time to socialize with friends at after-parties. The after-parties at cotillion usually feature food, drinks, and music. A debutante [ˈdebjəˌtɑnt] ball is a formal ball that includes presenting debutantes during the season, meaning usually during the spring or summer. Debutante balls may require prior instruction of social etiquette, and appropriate morals. ) after all. And you, you said
you weren't coming here, either. Raj: I have a thick accent. You
don't know what I said. Amy: I'd like to know why Penny's here.
Penny: I'm here to support my man, just like you. Sheldon: What are
you going to do? Take people's drink orders and get them wrong?
Leonard: Do it. Sheldon: What? Did she do it yet? Amy: She plans on
flirting with members of the tenure committee to further Leonard's
cause ( advance one's cause, raise one's stock 增加胜算, 加分)(further to develop or make progress in something: He has probably done more to further the cause of interracial harmony than any other person. Additional training is probably the best way to further your career 事业更上一层楼, 事业更进一步 these days.). Sheldon: Well, that's a fine how-do-you-do. Don't just stand
there. Take your breasts out. Howard: Ooh, meerkat fight (Meerkat Fight Despite their cooperative behavior, meerkats are aggressive animals, and conflicts between mobs are common. Meerkats compete for food and other resources.)! Amy: You're
all wasting your time. Sheldon is the most qualified for the job, and
no amount of gravity-defying bosom's going to change that. Seriously,
is that tape? Like, how are they staying up like that? Leonard: Way
to hit 'em with both barrels. Raj: You two should be ashamed of
yourselves. Using women to advance your cause with sexuality, and
whatever Amy plans on doing. Sheldon: Are you implying that my
girlfriend has no sexuality to exploit? Raj: Yes. Sheldon: Okay,
because that was not clear. Amy: Sheldon! Sheldon: What? That was
ambiguous. Raj: Well, now it's biguous. What are you gonna do about
it? Sheldon: Um… Howard: You could talk some smack about his
mother. Sheldon: Well, yes, of course, he wouldn't like that at all.
Last night, I was feeling in need of sexual release when I happened
to come across your mother. Leonard: Okay, okay. Guys, what are we
doing here? Sheldon: I don't know what you're doing, but I was about
to insinuate that I had coitus with Raj's mother for a dollar.
Leonard: Oh, you do what you want, but I don't want to lose my
friends over tenure. Friends are forever. Howard: So is tenure.
Bernadette: Walk. Leonard: I'm just gonna go home and let my work
speak for itself. Raj: You're right. This is beneath me 太不是我的水准了. Lie your
mother was last night. Leonard: How about it, Sheldon? Sheldon: What
do you think I should do? Amy: Well, you'll always be an academic
success, but I seriously question whether you'll make any more
friends. Sheldon: I don't want any more, but let's go. Barry: Are you
kidding? I would love to baby-sit for you. Janine: I could not ask
you to do that. Barry: Nonsense. Children love me. Something about me
just makes them laugh and laugh. Leonard: No. We cannot lose to that
jerk. Raj: Yeah, screw it. I'm going in. Sheldon: Wait. Hold on. I
believe screw it, I'm going in is what I said to your mother last
night. Don't worry, I didn't really say that. I find the concept of
coitus ridiculous and off-putting. Amy: Should have taken my breasts
out while I had the chance. Scene: Janine's office. Sheldon: (Knock,
knock, knock) Mrs Davis? (Knock, knock, knock) Mrs Davis? (Knock,
knock, knock) Mrs Davis? I know you're in there. I saw your car in
the parking lot. Janine: What? Sheldon: I just found out that you
recommended myself, Dr. Hofstadter and Dr. Koothrappali to be on the
short list for tenure. Janine: Well, despite your quirks, the three
of you are very accomplished in your respective fields. Sheldon: I
don't know what you mean by quirks, but, um, I do want to express my
gratitude. Janine: You didn't bring another gift, did you? Sheldon:
No, no. No, I learned my lesson. I understand that was inappropriate.
Janine: Good. Sheldon: Anyway, thank you. Janine: You're welcome.
(Sheldon attempts a jive handshake) I'm gonna pretend that didn't
happen. Sheldon: Yeah, right on, sister.
